This month I have had a love/hate relationship with the period known as the "two week wait". On the one hand I hate the unknown and I feel so out of control.
But, on the other hand, the unknown allows me to live in a fantasy world. In my mind I can imagine myself pregnant, announcing it, hearing the heartbeat, decorating a nursery, being showered by friends and family, and bringing home a baby.
It can be so real in my mind.
As soon as I take that test my fantasy world can quickly disappear with a negative result. All of the hopes and dreams for that month get thrown in the trash with that test.
I am not ready to face reality. I would like to continue to believe that my swollen and sore boobies, elevated temperature, and super sniffer are all indications that this will be the month and are not, in actuality, symptoms that I have imagined in my mind.
I am set to test this Friday. I don't think I am going to. I think I would like to stay in this fantasy world a little bit longer.
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